Good afternoon, dear readers. Today's adventures take us from the depths of barbarism (a close shave in a hairy situation, we were balanced on the razor's edge) to the smoky peak of amorality. No puns intended, of course.

Mario –

Today, just off the Campo de’ Fiori, we interviewed a barber by the name Mario. Yet another Mario. One would think that every last aging Italian man is named Mario. In fact, this has so far been empirically true. Anyways, Mario has been cutting hair for over fifty years. He didn’t seem to mind us interviewing him while he was cutting someone’s hair (the man getting his haircut was on a cell phone). We asked him what the current style haircuts for men were and said that short haircuts are in, adding that the fashion changes from day to day. He was very (read: ridiculously) knowledgeable about men's hair fashions. If anyone were to write a book on the subject, it is our firm contention that Mario is just the man for the job. When Brian asked what he would recommend for his hair, he said he would muss it up, use gel, and cut the back of it with a certain pair of small scissors. He said Tony’s hair was perfect. Brian asked if he could get a Mohawk, and Mario said yes, and that he would dye it pink. After Brian asked this, Mario said that he gave Billy Idol a haircut in the eighties.

spettinare – to muss the hair

corto – short

fobici – scissors

Pino –

Our next lucky interviewee was Pino, who works at a Tabaccheria just off the Campo de’ Fiori. The Tabaccheria also has a bar inside that sells coffee and sandwiches, but we only wanted to find out about the life of a tabacchi salesman. Pino, like many of the best Italian shop clerks, was very busy doing nothing. So busy doing nothing, in fact, that he didn’t even have time to speak to a few poor American students (yours truly--thank you, thank you). Still, being persistent, Brian got a rise out Pino by asking him if he felt bad selling cigarettes, because smoking kills. In the same vein, Brian asked a somewhat more conversational (and defensive) Pino how he could sell ‘death’. By ‘death’ Brian meant cigarettes, of course, and Pino said that it was the Italian government's fault as well. He said that they take a share of his profits, and that Brian should go take it up with parliament if he didn't like it; Pino didn't lose any sleep over selling tabacchi. Brian, smiling, asked Pino if he minded selling Gelato (they have a cooler with ice creams there, too) and making people fat, and he said he didn’t mind that either. Apparently, all Pino worries about is Pino. What a terrible world we live in!

sigaretta – cigerettes

morte – death

preoccupazione - worry